Hi everyone:

I usually don’t deal with this type of topic at Suddenly Single, but I wanted to shed some light on an issue that some of you may have faced in your marriage that has now ended.

That difficult subject is that of domestic abuse. According to a recent article in World Magazine, “most of the damage from domestic abuse is invisible. It involves repetitive behaviors that terrorize, dehumanize, objectify, degrade, and control spouses” (p. 38). The article goes on to say that “such abuse is a hammer to the soul, pounding over and over at the personhood, dignity, and freedom of a spouse” (p. 38).

Believe it or not, this abuse can go both ways. If you are the victim of this type of behavior, please seek professional help. While your church may be the best place to go, please understand that some pastors are not trained to help in these situations.

If you have made it out of an abusive situation, please don’t jump right back into another relationship until you have your own life sorted out. The only thing worse than one abusive relationship would be to find the same kind of individual and jump into another abusive alliance.

Take care,

Dr. Sheri